dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Randomize