I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
even my farts smell like vagina
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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