she was so not down for the gang bang
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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