Dual....:-)
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Randomize
