I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
