Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Someone signed my nipple.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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