Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
