U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
