to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I had to cum in my sink.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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