Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
