I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
