This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Randomize
