One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
they need to just BURY HIM!
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
They are going to name an STD after you.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Randomize
