he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
