dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Randomize
