and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
