I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
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