he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
