Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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