I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize