You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Randomize
