Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
honey bunches of taint.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize