mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
