very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
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