Me too!
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
