and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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