I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Send help, water and tortillas.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Randomize
