Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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