Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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