garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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