I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
