I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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