I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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