Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize