So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
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