rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
