so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
You dont lie about slip and slides
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
