I'm gonna have a badass scar
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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