Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
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