Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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