no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
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