talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize
