EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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