Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
We have started to decorate penises.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
