I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
