we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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