Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
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