So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
