im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
We don't watch enough power rangers
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
