Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
