There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
